The confessions of a clueless mind

 Ten years. It’s been a decade since you left, Dad — but in truth, I’ve been trying to understand you for much longer. Your later years were defined by illness — a failing heart, Parkinson’s, and a body that slowly stopped cooperating with the spirit inside. But that’s not the whole story. It took me years to realise that. Growing up, the narrative around you was… complicated. You were often seen as weak, even irresponsible. And as children, we accepted what we were told. We didn’t question it. We didn’t know how to. But time has a way of revealing quieter truths. As I grew older, I began to hear stories — from your brothers, your cousins — about the man you once were. Charismatic. Warm. The heart of every gathering. Someone people gravitated towards, someone who lit up rooms without trying. And I found myself wondering… what changed? Life, perhaps. Circumstances. The quiet weight of responsibilities and relationships that, over time, may have taken more than they gave. Somewhere a...

 In times of peace, when the world appears serene, Old tremors rise within—the unknown and the unseen. They are not strangers, but impressions carved in mind, Samskaras of forgotten acts, across lifetimes entwined. They stir the echoes of an uncomfortable past, One that cannot dwell with the fleeting present’s cast— Like phantoms in the inner field of silent thought, Not foes to battle, but veils to be seen through, not fought. Life offers second chances, but karma does not forget; The ledger of the soul records every deed and debt. New joys cannot erase the shadows etched in being— They follow the subtle self, in waking and in dreaming. These skeletons in the cupboard of consciousness remain, Returning as teachers, disguised in joy and pain. They steal the illusion of a guiltless, untouched future, For the jiva must reap what the doer chose to nurture. Yet beyond the torment, beyond the past’s vast cast, There stands the Witness—unchanging, free, steadfast. When ...

 Public discourse often treats spirituality and religion as interchangeable. Yet they operate on fundamentally different principles and serve distinct human needs. Understanding this distinction—particularly through the lens of descriptive spiritual traditions and prescriptive religious systems—clarifies why one emphasizes inner transformation while the other prioritizes collective order. Sanātana Dharma may be understood as a descriptive spiritual framework rather than a religion in the conventional sense. It does not begin with a fixed creed, a singular founder, or a closed canon of unquestionable truths. Instead, it articulates enduring human values—truthfulness, compassion, non-violence, integrity—as patterns observed in lived human experience. These values are not issued as absolute commands but presented as guiding principles, open to debate, reinterpretation, and contextual adaptation. The tradition assumes moral agency and intellectual humility: that human understanding i...

I have never subscribed to the “ Sachin is God ” cult that many fanboys have been revelling in, for the great man’s swansong. He is a great player, and a humble servant of the game. And some of the magical moments that he has given us Cricket fans will always stay etched in my memory. But is he one of the best players in Indian cricket today? Probably not, in my opinion. Also,   I firmly believe 2011, right after the World Cup win, was the perfect time for him to sign-off. By delaying his retirement, he has done a big disservice to his own legacy. However, ignoring his patchy form in the past 2 years, and looking at his larger contribution to Indian Cricket, and Cricket in general, the man deserves the grand farewell that he is getting. But it is annoying to see every media outlet eulogizing about Sachin for the past few weeks and making a messiah out of a man. For many non-fanatic fans of Sachin, this media frenzy is so overwhelmingly irritating that they have started direc...

The Year: 2020. The Venue: San Juan, Puerto Rico. The Occasion: World Cup Instant Cricket Finals. Guatemala Vs Samoa. An exciting final awaits the 100,000 screaming audiences and the millions watching on their television screens at home. People of all ages and races have come together, putting their differences and hatred for each other aside, for this momentous occasion. As the cheering grows louder, the two captains take the field. The Guatemalan skipper, in his bright magenta outfit, appears extremely confident of his chances, although the dressing room is full of nervous men in Magenta, biting at their fingernails fearing the backlash from the fanatic supporters back home should they end up losing the finals. At the other end, the Samoan dressing room is unusually quiet, with all the players, dressed in their traditional leaf-skirt and head-gear attire, bowing down in front of their Chief Shaman as he continues to chant a silent prayer to a Pagan God.  The Samoan captain, ...

Watching England fall to a young German team last night brought back memories of the time when I used to religiously follow the travails of Team India . There are many similarities between the English football team and the Indian cricket team.  The popularity they enjoy across the globe, the money they make in comparison to other teams in their sport, the intense scrutiny that their private lives are subjected to by the media, and last but not the least, their continued inability to perform when it matters. Just like Team India was blessed with superstars like Sachin, Azhar, Dravid, Ganguly , and more recently, Dhoni, Yuvraj, Sehwag etc, the Three Lions also have amidst them some of the most recognizable brand names such as Rooney, Lampard, Gerard, Terry to name a few. Individually, these superstars are considered the best (arguably) in their roles/positions. However, put them in a team together, and they are so abject that it is almost embarrassing to watch them play. Althoug...

Every generation has a golden era. For my generation, it was the 90's. Most kids on the cusp of adoloscence found their calling in the eventful period that preceded the Y2K euphoria. As a bunch of early teens just discovering the birds and the bees, the 90's heralded an exciting phase in our boyz-to-men journey. Coupled with the changing political and economical situation in the country, the period was significant for the various influences it had on us. As India, under the able yet eventually discredited P.V. Narasimha Rao, opened its doors to the world in a clear cry of capitalism, the first noticeable change in our lives was the advent of satellite TV. For a bunch that found its entertainment in a single channel on the state run Doordarshan for years, the sudden exposure to a variety of international channels, and the liberal dose of skinshow that they brought along, was a shock that took a while to adjust to. The influences of those early days, after a long period of la...

At long last, after the whole world, and then some, has already watched it, I finally managed to watch the year's biggest hit " 3 Idiots ". On my laptop, mind you. Yet, despite the constraints of the medium, the sheer magnificence of the movie remained unmitigated. There are very few movies that can be called perfect. Even a classic like " Rang De Basanti " had its share of detractors dismissing it to be too preachy and impractical. This latest offering from Rajkumar Hirani, however, is flawless. I know I am sounding like a fresh-off-the-boat fanboy here, but truth be told- the movie is perfect.  While there are conflicting views on how much of the script is based on Chetan Bhagat's novel, and since I have not read " Five Point Someone " myself, I'll be generous and give complete credit to Hirani and his team for such an engaging story and screenplay. Despite the obvious temptation to make it preachy, the director manages to keep it breezy ...

Everyone I know, and their uncles, have either recently published a book or in the process of writing one. Clearly, authoring a book is the " in " thing this season. He has done it, she is doing it. And if everyone is doing it, I too must jump on the bandwagon. The only thing I need now is the genre, theme and topic to start penning my future best seller. I have thought of a few genres to begin with. I could try my luck with fiction since I do have a mean imagination. However, I don't quite have the ability to sensationalize the  mundane, which is a must-have for fiction. Also, I believe in using the least number of words to put forward a point, which clearly does not agree with the fiction genre. Further, fiction requires the author to ramble on for pages describing the scene to create a vivid imagery . I, on the other hand, do not delve on imagery and would rather jump straight into the plot. Clearly, fiction is not for me. Which leads me to consider writing non-fic...

This past Saturday, we caught the evening show of “ Housefull ”. After nearly 3 hours of continuous entertainment, we walked out with a smile on our faces. “Housefull” will remain memorable for years to come. With an impressive ensemble star cast of Akshay Kumar, Deepika Padukone, Riteish Deshmukh, Lara Dutta and Arjun Rampal, director Sajid Khan has managed to pull off mind-boggling action with mind-numbing comedy, in what is a thoroughly entertaining journey into madness and absurdity. The movie does not even attempt to pretend to be an intelligent movie, and clearly calls for the audience to “ leave your brains at home ” to be entertained. The story, in short, is about a man (Akshay) looking to find true love to turn his bad luck into good. In this pursuit, he marries Jiah Khan, only to find out she loves someone else. True love then makes an entry in the form of the leggy Deepika Padukone, and the rest of the movie is all about how Akshay, with the help of Riteish and Lara, manag...

There is a common misconception, that being smart is the same as being intelligent. While there are many situations when the two might converge, there is still a clear difference between the two traits. I have often come across “ Smart Consultants ” who have a fantastic way with words, and can paint a picture out of the most mundane things. They can handle customer situations very deftly, and can "smartly" contain many situations from getting out of hand. However, most of the times, they don't deliver, in the most objective sense of the word. A smart consultant will find a way to evade blame or accountability without really addressing the core problem. They can, with their mumbo-jumbo, confuse the client to a point where the customer starts doubting his or her own understanding of the situation. In the “ convince or confuse ” debate, the smart consultant, more often than not, chooses the latter. If consultants are paid purely for the time they spend in engaging the cus...

People tell me I look younger than I am. Normally I'd be thrilled to hear that, but not when it comes from a client in a professional context. This has happened to me at least 4 times in the past month. I was in KL a couple of days last month on a few meetings. At one of these meetings, when I was introducing myself and talking about my near 10 year experience, one of the ladies quipped “ You look like you have just passed out of college. You don’t look like you have been working for all these years ”. And the guy along with her added, “ Are you counting your part-time on-campus experience as well? ”. If you have interacted with Chinese people, you’ll know that they betray zero emotion when they speak. More so with Chinese from Singapore/ Malaysia who are so “ kiasu ” that they are very measured and economic even in showing emotions. Which is why I am unsure if all the comments on my age were intended to make me feel good or bad. I was, therefore, left wondering and had to excus...

Kaminey has easily been the best reviewed movie of recent times among the Bollywood lot. Almost all the reviewers have been unanimous in their rating of the movie, and have been unabashed in their praises. Clearly, everyone seems to agree that Vishal Bharadwaj has a masterpiece on his hands. And Shahid Kapoor has arrived. Amidst all the euphoria and with great expectations, I watched Kaminey here in Singapore. Incidentally, this is my first movie in a theatre here for over a year, thanks to our little son who threatens to embarrass us every time we attempt to parade him in public. Since the plot and the characters have been described in lurid details in myriad reviews, I’ll save myself and the readers the trouble. Instead, I’ll play the critic. The movie, undoubtedly, is in a genre of its own. Or if you include Hollywood, this would be the Quentin Tarantino genre. Slick, crisp, pacy, hard-hitting and very contemporary. The movie runs at such a frenetic pace that you don’t want...

As I saw the news flash at the Breakfast Buffet on the 26th June about Michael Jackson's death, I went blank for a moment since this was truly shocking. But that momentary feeling of loss passed, and I continued with my hectic activities for the day. I was in Chennai for a series of meetings and seminars, and I had too much on my mind to keep me occupied. That, and also the fact that my memories of MJ had, over the years, been relegated to my subconscious mind. Over the next couple of days, the media went berserk with tributes and dedications to Michael, bringing back the memories from the days when Michael Jackson was a God. Slowly, but surely, the memories that long been banished to the lesser used confines of my mind assumed center-stage. And then it all started coming back. The King was Dead. Gone forever. Gone too soon. As a child growing up in the 80’s, I couldn’t escape the Michael Jackson magic despite the fact that I spent most of my early life in a non-descri...

All your life, you struggle and strive to achieve your goals. And you think that, and only that, is the key to happiness. You set lofty targets for yourself, and spend your entire youth slogging your butt and selling your soul to get there. For happiness awaits you there, or so you believe. You forget to stop and smell the roses. You don’t have time for a whiff of fresh air. A casual stroll in the evening is too much time wasted. An evening with the folks is an opportunity cost. If you are not living on the edge, you sincerely believe you are wasting too much space. Relationships are transactional for you, and you do whatever is necessary to keep them alive. Barely. And finally, you reach there. The happy place . But alas, there is no happiness that you feel. You are contented. There is certainly relief. But no happiness. And then you realize happiness does not await you at the destination. It was with you all along the journey. You realize that it is not about the ...

 I finally managed to devour all the 933 pages of “ Shantaram ”, the “autobiography” of Gregory David Roberts. If it was even a part true story, the man is a miracle. Regardless, it is a very well written book, and as long as one doesn’t get too hung up on the veracity of the true accounts that the author narrates, it makes for fantastic reading.  Gregory Roberts, known as Lin on the streets of Mumbai, was an escaped Australian convict, who found a home in Mumbai, where he could finally live a free life. During his years in Mumbai, he made many friends and several enemies, and lost quite a few of them. He also found true love, and lost it to the bitter games that were played in the Mafia background. He worked for the Mumbai mafia , but claimed to have never joined them since he did what he did for the people he believed in, rather than the cause that they represented. The book details Lin’s journey from his arrival in Mumbai, to his life in the Slums and his role as the sl...

I was pleasantly surprised at how popular the “ Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women ” had become on the internet forums and Social Networking websites. “ Pleasantly ” not because I advocate the cause, but because it shows that the Indian Woman has finally come of age.   She is not afraid to express herself on a public forum, even if it means she has to abase herself as “ loose ”. Many of my women friends, from academic and professional circles, have been very vocal in their support for the cause and have proudly proclaimed that they went to a pub on V-day and got themselves drunk silly. And that they sent a clear message to the Shri Ram Sena (SRS) that Indian women are not going to be confined to the age-old traditions of Hindutva by sending their “ pink chaddis ” to the SRS. That they are no longer a homely,   demure and soft-spoken tribe. As opposed to that, they are now a pub-going, loose and forward tribe.  Cause for celebration..yippeee! On a more pragmatic note,...

A few months ago, I came upon an interesting business model. In many ways, this was making money out of nothing. Yes, it is related to faith. I have this fascination for spirituality and religion, and during one of my explorations, I chanced upon a Buddhist monastery within the central business district of Singapore. For fear of inviting the wrath of certain people with vested interests, I will not reveal any further details about the whereabouts of this place. Now here is the interesting business model. The monastery makes money out of match-making and wedding ceremonies. What is so unique about that, you may ask. Well, it is unique since the match-making and wedding services are offered, not to young men and women, but to spirits of dead ancestors! According to ancient Chinese/ Buddhist beliefs, there is a clear hierarchy in the spirit world, and one of the key determinants of where a particular ancestor lies in the hierarchy is his or her marital status. It is believed that, in the ...